When Char held her youngest child, a son, Andrew Wesley, as a brand new baby in the hospital, she never dreamed that one day she would hold him in death in a funeral home too. So began her journey into the valley of deepest darkness as a mother. This is her telling of that journey. She shares her raw days of early grief, sinking yet clinging to her faith in God, believing with desperate hope He is with her and He loves her, which He has shown in His Son, and believe His love would come to help her breathe on, rise up and walk on. This is a story of God helping her find her way out of the collapse of grief, re-collect the pieces of her shattered heart and life, and learn to carry grief and live on. She will carry grief all her days because “grief is just love with no place to go” and so she will always need the hope of God to travel this road.
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Re-
collecting
My Shattered
Heart
Join me in my life-long journey as a mother carrying grief with hope
re-collecting my shattered Heart through music
Music is one of the best gifts I have discovered to comfort, sooth and experience healing in the midst of the deepest suffering.
Below is a link to a playlist with some of the music that was a life- line to my own heart in the early raw days of my grief journey and which I continue to be comforted and encouraged by today.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me.
—Psalm 23:4 ESV
THE ROAD*
One day without warning death came my way
Whether I wanted it or not I had no say
I was put on a road I never wanted to take
There’s no clear sense of it that I can make
Now it’s my turn to walk down this difficult road
Now it’s my turn to carry this heavy, painful load
I know others before me have had to walk this road too
I never knew how very hard of a thing it was to do
There are no exits on this road fellow travelers say
There’s no turning back as the road is only one way
The road is so dark, so hard, so full of pain
I feel my way along, hoping I’m making some gain
I must think true thoughts to make it I know
God loves me, He’s with me, He promises so
So I trust someday this road will bring me back to the light
I trust someday this road will bring beauty back to my sight
Until then I take the next step with my Good Shepherd by my side
And look to Him to lead me and be my faithful forever guide
*Original Poem By Char From “Re-Collecting My Shattered Heart”
He will cover you with His feathers, and under His wings you will find refuge, His faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. —Psalm 91:4 NIV
He will cover you with His feathers, and under His wings you will find refuge, His faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. —Psalm 91:4 NIV
About the author
Char Brademeyer is a wife of thirty-nine years to her husband Jeff, mom to three, and Gigi to seven. Char has a degree in business with a minor in written communications, and her writings have been mostly her private journals until this book. Char has worked in the travel industry for fifteen years and has traveled to many places, but there is no place like home in Arizona. She never imagined she would travel the road of grief when she lost her youngest son. She has a heart to encourage women and hopes by sharing her story, she can help another to keep faith and hope in the One who loves us most, Jesus, and see how His deep, rescuing love gives us strength to live on and love on, and have joy even in the sorrow. Char loves spending time with her family, and her heart is always filled up to the full being with her grand-babies, and hunting to find gifts of God's love each day.
So you have sorrow now, but I will see you again; then you will rejoice, and no one can rob you of that joy.
— John 16:22 NLT